Tattoo For U

Question:

: > : > >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m : > >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper : > >reference. : > : > A= American : > T= Teachers of : > B= Burlesque dancing : > : > Look up burlesque in the diictionary, you’ll be quite suprised : > : A=Arses : T=Twat : B=Bollocks Oh, All Terrain Bicycle isn’t it? Do I feel stupid or what?     ^   ^       ^

Response:

: : > : : > >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m : : > >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper : : > >reference. : : > : : > A= American : : > T= Teachers of : : > B= Burlesque dancing : : > : : > Look up burlesque in the diictionary, you’ll be quite suprised : : > : : A=Arses : : T=Twat : : B=Bollocks : Oh, All Terrain Bicycle isn’t it? Do I feel stupid or what? :     ^   ^       ^ Actually it’s Amazingly Transparent Bullsh*t as opposed to Monotonously Tedious Bullsh*t. A lot of ATB can be found in the pro an con arguments on helmets and the environment as well as some choice stuff about freezing locks, bicycles that stretch with age and the ever popular depilatory rants. Now if MTB is what you crave, look to the articles on material X vs material Y, downhill velocities, and most stories that involve anything legal or political. What remains is about 70% on what bike should I buy, 10% I love my Dale, 10% get rich…get laid….05% non bicycle mindlessness(thats me). The small amount of useful information that remains is well worth the time it takes to find it. J.S.

Response:

: >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper >reference. > A= American > T= Teachers of > B= Burlesque dancing > Look up burlesque in the diictionary, you’ll be quite suprised

A=Arses T=Twat B=Bollocks

Response:

>> My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.   >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper >reference.

A= American T= Teachers of B= Burlesque dancing Look up burlesque in the diictionary, you’ll be quite suprised

Response:

> > Any good new ways to cut those grams? > Get a haircut.  Shave your legs.  Cut your toenails.  Blow your nose. > Floss your teeth.

You left out a few bodily functions…. including one best performed with your lover….

Response:

>In my ever-continuing quest to not get any work done I have turned >this into a WWW page, see: >    http://www.std.com/homepages/jimf/biking/slang.html

It turns out that they reconfigured our www server and destroyed all my links; http://world.std.com/~jimf/biking/slang.html will work. Sorry for the misinformation, it actually works internally so I never even noticed…. jim frost — http://world.std.com/~jimf

Response:

>retro-grouch n. a rider who is satisfied with the older, heavier MTB equipment of the >eighties. The retro-grouch doubts that newer equipment is worthy of purchase, until >it has proven that it is tough and better than the old stuff. The retro grouch doesn’t >even consider upgrading every year (has to be coerced or something has to break).

Probably should be "The retro-grouch doubts that newer equipment is worthy of purchase, until it has proven that it is tough and better than the old stuff (ie about the time the new stuff is considered old stuff)." jim frost — http://world.std.com/~jimf

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says.. >death march n.  a ride that turns into an investigation of your endurance >limit.  "The bridge was out, and I had to go all the way back the way I >came.  So the morning’s nice, easy ride turned into a Bataan death >march."

I have more often heard the following definitions. death march n. Any long portage section, generally uphill. Not applicable to riding situations. >front wheelie n.  what "endo" used to mean in BMX:  a trick where the >rider applies the front brake and lifts the back wheel off the ground; >this is the basis for many BMX tricks.  Most riders cannot pedal >effectively while doing a front wheelie.

More often called nose-wheelie Lake jump: A certain type of trials competition where the object is to fly into a lake in the most technical manner possible. >potato chip n.   a wheel that has been bent badly, but not taco’d.

Potato chip: a wheel that has been tacoed. Also called Pringled. >retro-grouch n.  a rider who prefers an old bike with old components and >isn’t fond of new, high-tech equipment.

retro-grouch n. a rider who waits until a new type of component has proven that it is tough and better than the old componentry, instead of upgrading every year. >roadie n.  a rider who prefers riding on paved surfaces.

roadie n. a person who races primarily on the road, or a person who rides on a road bike. softtail n. dual suspension bike, from motocross hardtail n. front only suspension, from motocross epic n. any long technical ride that results in all riders having the snot beat out of their bodies, and a general feeling that you can’t wait to ride it again. — Dave Blake " The more you drive, the less intelligent you are."  - Repo man

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>says.. >death march n.  a ride that turns into an investigation of your endurance >limit.  "The bridge was out, and I had to go all the way back the way I >came.  So the morning’s nice, easy ride turned into a Bataan death >march." >I have more often heard the following definitions. >death march n. Any long portage section, generally uphill. Not applicable to riding >situations.

No no no. What you refer to (long portage) is called bike-hiking or a weenie walk. A death march is definitely a ride that is longer/harder than desired/expected… >retro-grouch n.  a rider who prefers an old bike with old components and >isn’t fond of new, high-tech equipment. >retro-grouch n. a rider who waits until a new type of component has proven that >it is tough and better than the old componentry, instead of upgrading >every year.

Yes, I would agree with this amendment. Perhaps it should be worded: retro-grouch n. a rider who is satisfied with the older, heavier MTB equipment of the eighties. The retro-grouch doubts that newer equipment is worthy of purchase, until it has proven that it is tough and better than the old stuff. The retro grouch doesn’t even consider upgrading every year (has to be coerced or something has to break). >roadie n.  a rider who prefers riding on paved surfaces. >roadie n. a person who races primarily on the road, or a person who rides >on a road bike.

You don’t have to race to be a roadie, but they do ride road bikes exclusively. I don’t know what you call MTB riders who prefer pavement, but I wouldn’t call them roadies, that would be insulting to actual roadies . The roadie culture involves the worship of bald, skinny tires, distance rides on pavement, drafting, and always referring to one’s component group as a "gruppo". >epic n. any long technical ride that results in all riders having the snot beat >out of their bodies, and a general feeling that you can’t wait to ride it again.

Yes, epic should be in there. For any participant of the epic ride not having the "feeling that you can’t wait to ride it again", it was a death march.                                 Tom Purvis                 M.S. Candidate, Computer Information Systems               Colorado State University, Fort Collins, Colorado

Response:

Vadim Tkachenko asked: > Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean?

So I decided it must be time to post the MTB slang dictionary that I’ve been compiling.  It started out here (rec.bicycles.off-road) and on the         Internet MTB dictionary. Most of the terms and definitions in this dictionary of mountain-biking terms and slang were posted to the rec.bicycles.off-road newsgroup and/or journalistic USENET republisher may have published a few of these in the LA Times as well, in May or June ‘95.  The intro is mine. The dividing lines are very fuzzy, among normal language, specialized (heh heh) jargon, and slang.  Several people independently started lists of MTB slang, and I’ve taken the lists I’ve seen posted, merged them, added some terms that aren’t really quite slang, and wrote a few intro paragraphs.         — Doug Many of the slang terms used in mountain biking come from the off-road motorcycling culture, from "trials" bicycling and BMX, and from road cycling.  And some of the (numerous!) terms for "crash" came from skiing, snowboarding, surfing, or skating (inline or boards).  Other subcultures have also contributed terms now used in MTBing — for example, the word "unobtanium" had been used for decades before the advent of mountain bikes, both in auto racing and in the space program. There’s a little Internet history behind this dictionary.  In February (‘95), Tom Purvis, from Colorado State, posted a message to the rec.bicycles.off-road newsgroup that said, in part:     Offroading needs more lore. More culture. More vernacular. [...]     Let us use the ‘net for something really valuable–let’s compile     a list of bikey slang. Biff, face plant, gravity check, endo; those     are pretty good terms, but let’s get some of the really clever ones. So a lively thread ensued; and I assume Jerry Dunn made another, similar request a bit later.  He (Jerry) summarized some of it in April, for a book he has in the works …     Thanks so much for all the responses to my request for off-road bike     slang, for my book (Idiom Savant: Slang As It Is Slung — to be     published in fall 1995).  Here’s the summary I said I’d post.  (Any     everything!  You’re a *great* group of people, very helpful,     articulate, and funny.  All the best — Jerry Jerry’s summary is in the exact style of, and is almost a total superset of, a list that my brother Mike sent me by e-mail in May or June (some of the entries were edited down; only one was added).  He said he’d found his list in the LA Times Sunday magazine.  The format and wording is too similar to be a coincidence.  So … a question for Jerry Dunn, I guess: did the LA Times Mag article appear under your byline?  (I’m just curious.) Jerry’s original chapter title was "Off-Road Bike Riders Offer a Crash Course in Slang". — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — –  SunSoft->DevPro::                    ||   be played cross-country."   Languages.ADE(C++);                 ||     — Calvin & Hobbes — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – — – air n.  space between the tires and the ground.  (Both tires must be off the ground or it isn’t "air".)   Said to be caught or gotten.  See "sky". ano adj.  frequently-misspelled abbreviation for "anodized".  See "purple". ATB n.  All-Terrain Bike or Biking.  A synonym for MTB. auger v.  to involuntarily take samples of the local geology, usually with one’s face, during a crash.  See "face plant". bacon n.  scabs on a rider’s knees, elbows, or other body parts. bail v.  to jump off in order to avoid an imminent crash. betty n.  any female rider. biff n.  a crash.  Synonyms:  involuntary dismount, wipeout. v.  "I biffed and then wiped away the blood." biopace adj.  a now-discredited Shimano techno-fad where the chainrings were made intentionally not circular — instead, they were elliptical, in order to (allegedly) smooth the power delivery, by giving the rider an effectively lower gear for part of the spin cycle.  Now used to describe any uneven pedaling motion.  Also used as a synonym for pogo-ing. boing-boing n.  a bike with full (front and rear) suspension.  Might possibly be considered offensive by certain owners of said bikes. bolt-on n.  a woman with breast implants.  Derived from the term for after-market bicycle parts that are literally bolted on. bonk v.  to run out of energy or grow exhausted on a ride.  "I bonked so early it was embarrassing." bring home a Christmas tree v.  to ride (or crash) through dense bushes, so leaves and branches are hanging from your bike and helmet.  See "prune". BSG n.  acronym for "Bike Store Guy". bunny n.  1. same as betty, but used to emphasize the female rider’s body; could be considerd insulting to some.  2. female novice rider. bunny hop v.  to lift both wheels off the ground by crouching down and then exploding upward, pulling the bike with you.  Useful for clearing obstructions, such as curbs, potholes, logs.  Differs from its older BMX & trials meaning — see "jump". buzz n.  euphoric feeling.  Commonly used after a particularly hard passage is successfully completed.  "I got such a buzz after that uphill grunt." carve v.  to ride with great speed around the corners of a twisting fire road.  (from skiing) captain crash v.  to "go down with the ship".  Usually the result of a novice spud-user failing to clip out in time. cashed adj.  to be too tired to ride any farther; bonked. chainring tattoo n.  the dotted-line scar you get from gouging your shin on the chainring.  See "rookie mark". chainsuck n.  condition when the bike chain gets jammed between the frame and the chain rings, or when the chainring is so worn that it holds onto the chain and lifts it up to meet the incoming part of the chain. clean v.  to negotiate a trail successfully without crashing.  "I cleaned that last section." clipless adj.  misleading name for a pedal-and-shoe system where the clips or cleats clip onto the soles of special shoes.  Called "clipless" because you can’t see the clips when you’re clipped in.  Contrast with "toe clips". clip out (or, sometimes, click out) v.  to disengage one’s spuds. cloon n.  slamming into the ground, resulting in a ringing head, or a delay in the action.  Term used in biking, skiing, and snow boarding. corndog v.  to become covered in silt, usually after a fall. crotch-testing n.  sudden impact between a male rider’s private parts and something very hard and pointy, such as a handlebar stem or seat. curb grind n.  expensive erasure of low-hanging, shiny parts of the bike on a curb or rock. curb slide v.  to place the front wheel up on a curb and allow the rear tire to scrape along the curb, usually resulting in a loud tearing sound. dab v.  to put a foot down in order to catch your balance on a difficult section of trail.  "I made it without crashing, but I had to dab once." death cookies n.  fist-sized rocks that knock your bike in every direction but the one you want to proceed in. death march n.  a ride that turns into an investigation of your endurance limit.  "The bridge was out, and I had to go all the way back the way I came.  So the morning’s nice, easy ride turned into a Bataan death march." dialed in adj.  when a bike is set up nicely and everything works just right. digger n.  a face plant.  "Look at that guy on that gnarly single track… he’s going to go over the bars and do a digger." dirt bike n.  an off-road *motor*cycle.  Usually louder than MTBs. drillium n.  any part with lots of holes drilled in it to make it lighter. dual-track n. a dirt road used by four-wheeled vehicles rarely enough that their tires have made ruts that became parallel singletracks. Also called doubletrack.  See singletrack. endo n.  the maneuver of flying unexpectedly over the handlebars, thus being forcibly ejected from the bike.  Short for "end over end".  "I hit that rock and went endo like nobody’s business."  See "superman".   In BMX riding, "endo" used to be a synonym for "front wheelie". engine n.  the rider. face plant n.  hitting the ground face first.  "Joe hit a tree root and did a spectacular face plant."  Synonyms: auger, digger, soil sample, spring planting. first blood n.  credit to the first rider in a group who crashes and starts bleeding as a result. foot fault n.  when a rider can’t disengage his cleats from the pedals before falling over.  See "horizontal track stand". fred n.  a person who spends a lot of money on his bike and clothing, but still can’t ride.  "What a fred — too much Lycra and titanium and not enough skill."  Synonym:  poser.  Occasionally called a "barney". front wheelie n.  what "endo" used to mean in BMX:  a trick where the rider applies the front brake and lifts the back wheel off the ground; this is the basis for many BMX tricks.  Most riders cannot pedal effectively while doing a front wheelie. FS or F/S adj.  an ambiguous term, can mean Front Suspension or Full Suspension.  Not used by anyone who wishes to be understood. giblets n.  all the colorful parts and pieces that you can add or change out on a bike. gonzo adj.  treacherous, extreme.  "That vertical drop was sheer gonzo." granny gear n.  the lowest gear available on a bike, which only a grandmother would need to use; designed for steep uphill climbing, but extremely easy to pedal in on flat ground. gravity check n.  a fall. grindies n.   e.g., "All that dried mud and sand left me with a loud case of the grindies in my drivetrain." grunt n.  a very difficult climb, requiring use of the granny gear. gutter bunny n.  a bicycling commuter. half-track n.  a trail so narrow and/or

… read more »

Response:

>So I decided it must be time to post the MTB slang dictionary that I’ve >been compiling.  It started out here (rec.bicycles.off-road) and on the

In my ever-continuing quest to not get any work done I have turned this into a WWW page, see:         http://www.std.com/homepages/jimf/biking/slang.html If you (Doug) send me updates I’ll keep it up-to-date. jim frost — http://www.std.com/homepages/jimf

Response:

I think that it was originally a way to discern early production mountain bikes from the early "Gary Fisher Mountainbikes" moniker of the early 1980’s. Personally, I don’t use the term ATB so as to distinguish from Montgomery Wards. However, I guess it is an accurate description of being an All-Terrain Bicycle. P.S.-26.5 pounds w/XT, XTR, Gripshift.

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>> My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.   >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper >reference.

All Terrain Bike.  I thought all my life.

Response:

>> My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.   >Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper >reference.

All-Terrain-Bike(sp?)

Response:

I’ve always known it to mean All Terrain Bicycle – voila, ATB –Terry – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m >trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper >reference.

Response:

> Any good new ways to cut those grams?

   Get a road bike! My Peugeot road bike cost a lot less than my new cro-mo framed MTB, but weighs a good 2-3 lbs less. Of course, it’s not exactly as strong as an MTB, but if you’re looking for speed…    Either that or get a half-decent MTB, as long as it has a frame made of something lighter than cast iron.    Once you’ve got that decent bike, return it and get the model with a frame three inches smaller, get smaller and well-worn tires, drill holes in the frame every 2 inches, rip off the front derailleur (and shifter), snap out every second spoke, remove any superfluities like shocks or climbing bars, toss out the water bottle and the seat (hey, you can ride standing!), scrape off the paint, starve yourself down to a BMI of 18 or so, and wear silk or nothing! Then you’ll *really* be light… — Peace to all

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> My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.  

Please forgive me a REALLY STUPID question, but what does ‘ATB’ mean? I’m trying to decipher it for almost two years, and still can’t find the proper reference. — Still alive and smile stays on, Vadim Tkachenko.                              http://www.lucky.net/~vt/private/ – mirror

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> : > Any good new ways to cut those grams?

  My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.   > None of that foo-foo TiKevlarMagnesiumBeryllium crapola for me.  If it > can’t rust, I don’t want it.

 26 pounds, if only I could be that light, my park pre is about 30 lbs! (and I only weigh 140), but it still goes where I want it (just not as fast as it should).  Feel free to donate to my buy-a-25-lb-bike fund. glenn

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>> Any good new ways to cut those grams? >Get a haircut.  Shave your legs.  Cut your toenails.  Blow your nose. >Floss your teeth.

Go to the bathroom. -=[doug]=-

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I reduced weight on my bike by replacing the bottom bracket with a Sampson ti one.  I also purchased a Camelback for hydration purposes (and thus eliminated the need for water bottles and cages).  Replacing my saddle with a Selle Italia Flite helped but greatly decreased long-distance comfort.  Lastly I replaced my tires with Kevlar beaded versions (Tioga Psycho-K front and Continental Cross Country Pro rear) and found lighter weight butyl tubes (Nashbar sells ‘em cheap).  And I replaced my skewers and seat post binder with ti versions.  I’m a lightweight rider so I’m not too worried about the ti equipment breaking. Cheers. Callie

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> Any good new ways to cut those grams?

Get a haircut.  Shave your legs.  Cut your toenails.  Blow your nose. Floss your teeth.

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: > Any good new ways to cut those grams? : Get a haircut.  Shave your legs.  Cut your toenails.  Blow your nose. : Floss your teeth. Take a poop.  Leave the girlfriend home.  Hell, even leave the wife home.  Leave the bike home…much lighter to pedal a virtual bike.   Become bulemic.  Live at high altitude on a smaller planet. Be one with the sofa.  Don’t worry about weight, because when you’re dead the only people who’ll care is the pallbearers and the sap you left your heavy bike to in your will.  My ATB is 26 pounds and rides just fine.   None of that foo-foo TiKevlarMagnesiumBeryllium crapola for me.  If it can’t rust, I don’t want it. Otis :

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Any good new ways to cut those grams? — === increase our bandwidth ::: === no sIgnatures, hEaders, :: === or qUoting –::–::–:: ::

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>– >=== increase our bandwidth ::: >=== no sIgnatures, hEaders, :: >=== or qUoting –::–::–:: ::

Uh, did I miss a joke here somewhere? Zeke

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: Any good new ways to cut those grams?         I’m considering donating a kidney….  And maybe I can live with out a small part of my liver.  I don’t have much use for my toes, so they can go, too.  Perhaps I can get titanium kneecaps…. —                                 * One night I was layin’ down,         The Mighty Dan          * I heard Momma and Poppa talkin.          "I’m the man!"         *   Let that boy boogie-woogie,                                 *   it’s in ‘em, and it’s got to come out.                                 *             — John Lee Hooker

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